


Living Without You

by acclaimedwriter



Category: Casualty (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-21
Updated: 2020-02-21
Packaged: 2021-02-28 07:13:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 828
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22830010
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/acclaimedwriter/pseuds/acclaimedwriter
Summary: Trying to live without Duffy, is the hardest thing Charlie's ever had to do. He can't go home because his home doesn't exist anymore, Duffy was home and without her, he has nothing. [Follows current storyline]
Relationships: Lisa "Duffy" Duffin/Charlie Fairhead
Kudos: 8





	Living Without You

“You need to go home, Charlie.”

Charlie briefly glanced up at the figure at the table and back down at his whiskey glass, trailing his finger along the rim. Home? Where exactly was home now that Duffy was gone? 

This was his third night, sitting at this table in the local pub, downing his sorrows. He couldn’t face going home. The house was too cold and empty. He necked back the whiskey and put down his glass, moving to stand up to go and get another from the bar.

“Charlie?” Robyn’s hand came to rest on his arm and he shook his head. He didn’t want sympathy. He didn’t want to go home. He just wanted to drink until he couldn’t feel or remember anything anymore.

“Leave me alone!” There was a sharp edge to his tone and Robyn relented. Her hand moved from his arm and she watched as he made his way to the bar. She sighed. She wasn’t sure what to do, she couldn’t exactly leave him in this state but she couldn’t force him to go home either.

Charlie ordered another whiskey. It was funny to think five years ago, he was so used to being lonely. He had nothing worthwhile in his life. A cold, dark house every night and his job. Then Duffy returned and it was very much, the light in his life again. She gave him a purpose, she made his life worth living.

He shook his head, trying to shake the memories from his mind! Charlie hated thinking about her, it just made his heart break even further and right now, he didn’t think it was possible.

He was bitter about all the missed opportunities they’d had over the years. All those times, Charlie had allowed her to slip through his fingers. 

Charlie missed the little things. The companionship. Having someone to talk to after work, sharing a bed. Her gentle snores, the way her hands and feet were always cold and she thought it was hilarious to put her feet and hands on his skin in the morning and at night. Her giggle. Her green eyes. Her smile. 

“Another large whiskey, and a vodka.” He ordered, harshly wiping the tear from his cheek. 

The night seemed to pass in a mixture of whiskey and vodka until Charlie called it a night and stumbled home. He promptly passed out on the sofa. 

“What an Earth am I going to do with you?” 

He groaned, coming round on the sofa. His mind was so heavy and foggy but he could’ve sworn he _heard_ her voice. 

“Duffy?” He mumbled and sat up on the sofa. He slowly opened his eyes, to find Duffy stood by the fireplace, her hand on her hip. 

She sighed and shook her head fondly, “You need to let them help you.”

“I don’t need help.” He replied back, though he wasn’t sure if he was dreaming... or hallucinating. 

“When was the last time you ate properly? Or had a shower and a shave?” She sighed and sat beside him. She gently touched his cheek, “You’re looking like a vagrant.” 

Charlie’s eyes flickered closed, “I miss you.” He whispered.

“And you think I don’t?”

“I don’t want to be here without you.” A tear rolled down his cheek, “you gave me a purpose .”

“It was my time to go Charlie. I had too. My angel wings were waiting.”

“But I wanted to go first.”

She laughed gently, “You’re not ready. You’ve got things you need to do first.”

“But why you?” 

Duffy shrugged her shoulders and met Charlie’s eye. “It was time.”

“It hurts.” He whispered, the emotion evident in his voice. 

“It probably won’t ever stop hurting but you’re needed here. I’m in safe hands, Megan and mum are looking after me. I’m not on my own. And I can’t bare to see you on your own either.”

“You know I love you?”

Duffy smiled brightly, “I never doubted it.”

He gasped slightly as her lips met his, giving him a soft gentle kiss. He deepened the kiss as he pulled her closer to him. She felt so real, so alive... 

“I need to go.”

“Not yet. Don’t leave me yet...” Charlie wanted five more minutes with his wife. Even just a minute he’d be happy with. 

“I’ll always be here.” She touched his chest, “and when you need me the most, I’ll send you a sign.” 

Charlie nodded, his eyes feeling really heavy once again.

“I love you, Charlie Boy. Don’t you ever forget that.”

“I love you too.” He mumbled before he succumbed to sleep. When he finally stirred in the morning with a pounding headache, Charlie vaguely remembered the hallucination from last night. Picking up the white feather that lay on the coffee table, he stroked his fingertips against the feathers. 

_ “And when you need me most, I’ll send you a sign.”  _

He smiled. She was always here with him, she’d never left. 


End file.
